The Jaguar

Fanny Mae walked into The Jaguar and was greeted by a greasy looking man in a fedora hat. As she stepped inside, the door shut behind her, drowning out the sound of a crazy man yelling about how he is Jesus.
"Can't be too careful in this town, there are a lotta crazies out there." the man grinned at her through several gold teeth. Fanny Mae nodded politely in agreement. He continues, "I mean just today, I saw a man walking around in a long trench coat and a hat coverin' his face, don't think I've seen 'im before. I'm sure he had something to do with that dern Donald gettin shot straight in his leg."
"That's very sad," Fanny Mae uttered. "So you said something about a job? What would I be doing, waiting tables or something. I'm real good with people and I am real-" The man laughed, cutting her off. Fanny Mae just stared at him in confusion.
"Honey, you got the wrong idea, this ain't no fancy country club, we don't go no food."
"You mean this ain't a restaurant?"
"You're obviously new to this town, sweetheart. The Jaguar is the best damn strip joint on this side of anywhere! We got great numbers, we even added a midget stripper, that's the best fuckin' shit I've seen in a long time! We got lots of costumers, if you look over there you'll see the wall with some of our regulars on it."
Fanny Mae was shocked into silence. She studied the wall with the pictures and names of all The Jaguar frequenters. She read, Danny Hiser, Paulo Nadie, Andrew Underwood, David Borisovich Sokolov, and Bernard Rattifice. She turned away from all of the scrutinizing eyes, staring and peering through her. Or at least through her clothes.
"Sweetcakes, listen I don't have all day, do you want this job or not?"
"I am not your sweetcakes, and I absolutely don't want such a horrible job! Exposing myself in front of vile, sleazy old men? No thank you." Fanny Mae turned and headed for the door, but the man grabbed her arm and spun her quickly around to face him.
"I guess you're pretty strong minded, I can't make you do anything. But you should take this job, you've got a nice, tight ass, I just know you'll bring in a load of dough. The offer stands, come back anytime," he smiles mischievously "...sweetcakes." Fanny Mae yanked her arm free from the man's grip and stormed out in a rage.
Fanny Mae stepped out into the cool fall air, but her face was still burning red with anger and embarrassment. Just as she was about to turn the corner onto Dublin Avenue, she hears a several cops cars, with blaring sirens, pull up to the Jaguar. They roughly handcuffed a man, threw him into the cop car, and sped away. Fanny Mae was staring cars speeding away, when a man came up behind her. He said, "The guy they just handcuffed, he's some famous rapper, I forget his name. He's been hiding out at The Jaguar for days. They finally got him." Fanny Mae turned around and peered into a familiar pair of eyes. She had seen this man on the wall of The Jaguar not 5 minutes ago. She recognized him as David Borisovich Sokolov." Without saying a word, Fanny Mae looked down and quickly walked away.
"I was just trying to be nice," David yelled after her. "whatever!"
Men, Fanny Mae thought furiously to herself. They can never just leave a woman to herself. And to think, that man wanted me to be a stripper! Ha! Like that would suit me... who would possibly want all that attention for being a naked whore? I just don't get it. I mean I'm sure the job pays, nice...and you do get to meet a lot of men. But I'm sure they're all shady and think they're big hotshots throwin' all that money around! Me? A stripper? Please...
Fanny Mae walked up to the Jupiter Apartment Building, narrowly missing the construction being done around a manhole outside. She ascended the steps and burst into her apartment, still in a rage from what had happened earlier. She collapsed into a chair and let out a big, exhausted sigh. Just as she was about settled, she heard I loud, rather violent knock on her door.